Hi, I want to share my story. I am 21 years old and lately I have noticed a very disturbing trend in my behavior. But first I will tell you more about me and the people around me (my girlfriend and my friends) to make the picture clearer ... My girlfriend and I have been together for 3 years, she recently moved to live with me and I love her very much , I am very happy with her, I miss nothing, a completely full-fledged relationship in which I am completely calm and feel good. Ever since he moved in with me, I've somehow lost the desire to go out with friends. I'm just fine with her, I'm having a great time and somehow I took it less and less often to go out. Before I didn't stop, I constantly tried to be among people, I couldn't stand myself. And right now, if I'm not working, I prefer to stay home and watch movies or listen to music, to be with my girlfriend in a calm and cozy home. I grew up in an ordinary family, with great parents, I had a very happy childhood. I went to school with pleasure because I had many friends there. We were all like one family. During the week I was invited to a birthday party, we constantly got together and had crazy parties as it should be. But it so happened that about two years ago we started smoking weed from time to time for fun. Everything was normal, but lately things are going out of bounds (at least for me). I don't mind weed, but I strongly oppose all synthetic drugs. Naturally, I tried to see what it was, and this further strengthened my negative opinion of them. So to come to the topic ... My friends have started to deal with various amphetamines and pills and what worries me is that these people their only topics of conversation are like "at this party how I smeared" or "this weed is scary that day I was so bad that .... (what happened to him) "and somehow I started to feel alienated from my own friends, with whom I grew up, with whom I played on the sand in kindergarten when I was 4, with whom I was was my school years, and with whom I shared many of the important moments in my life. I see that I no longer have ANYTHING to do with the people who have played a very important part in my life. When I went out with them, they gradually started talking about these topics more and more often, until gradually it so happened that today THIS IS JUST WHAT IS TALKED ABOUT and I feel very bad in their company, because I don't take part in the conversations so much, somehow I stand silently on the sidelines and "look smart" and I feel very depressed and sad with these people. When I try to change the subject it is for a short time and then they return in one way or another to the "eternal themes". We recently had a party where I felt really bad. The reason was that everyone used a lot of everything, and I didn't want to take this rubbish and somehow I was always away from the whole action. Then they got into the movie, and I was more like a bystander and just stood, drank and watched what was going on. All night I took a minimal part in the conversations, at one point everyone started looking at me and asking me "say something", "what are you silent about", "
Answers 7
She sits at home with her boyfriend and does not bother with these "friends" of yours, you will see how in time some of them will see through simplicity and drugs, their minds will come and they will look for you themselves. Otherwise, now most of all to see that you are against drugs and to start inciting you to take and you with them from my own experience I know that something like "It's like what a man you are" pull a line for mood with us is not done nothing will happen to a madman from a highway "
Everything is arranged perfectly for you. My story is identical with the small difference that I am with my girlfriend for 1 year and a half. Start building your future. You haven't mentioned what you study or work, but you obviously don't pay for your time in the right way. In general, the formula is sport + education + money + girlfriend = good life. Leave them to your friends "in the movie" (:
I experienced the same thing. I know very well what it is like to be among your friends with whom you grew up, whom you have known for as long as you can remember, and despite everything to feel that you are almost in contact with strangers. People just change, you have changed in one way, they have changed in another, you cannot be the same from childhood and school years. In my case, it so happened that at one point, somehow by itself, I even stopped all contact with them. I didn't want it, I didn't aim for it, it just happened. My company with them, instead of making me happy, feeling good with my friends, I was busy. I realized that even though I grew up with these people and have known them since I was a child, I am already very different. My advice is to find a new environment with which to have common interests, with which to excite some things, in two words - to be on the same frequency.
I am the person who started the topic. I'm not working at the moment because last year I had the opportunity to go on a brigade for a few months and I chose to leave work to try something new. I came back with a lot of money in early November and decided that I would not work for a few months because I also had exams and decided that it was preferable to pay more attention to education. That's why I stay at home all day. Otherwise, at the moment I have a great desire to do something and I will look for a job. And this with friends - obviously everyone has to take their own path. And when I'm not happy in their company ... it comes naturally to withdraw ..
Everything changes, every day, for better or worse, life is like that! .. :) What was before? Is it very important! Hah, look what it is now, and if you don't like something, you have complete freedom and the right to change it, right? !! ...;) Don't be idle, but make a decision ... What do you think? !! .. You say yourself, every time you are with them and what happens, you see how they gradually sink into some stupid and harmful actions !!! Eee, how much will you tolerate? Today, tomorrow, another day :) How much? And the important thing is to understand that once upon a time, you were together, you did a lot together! You can't help but feel like close to them :) However, they have changed, and not only them, but you;) You have developed, as far as I can see you have outgrown a lot of your past, and now you have different views, which is very nice! But look at them, they seem to be trying to do nonsense and go crazy !!! Hmmm .. it's not bad sometimes to relax, to do some "madness", yes, but if it's always like that, and that's with drugs! On the way they have gone, they risk too much, they can fuck their whole psyche and life! ... If you ask me, their actions are completely pointless, they have instilled in themselves that it is time to live as long as possible, because they feel that they are growing: D ) Because they do not know what else to do! Hmmm ... it's not like there's nothing you can do! .. :) The choice is a choice, you hesitate to make a decision because you are not sure what to do next if you decide to withdraw from them. There is another way, try to get on the right track at least one of them, with which you get along best! Tragicomic is your only conversation, to be only for whom how he got drunk or intoxicated and how long he lasted !!! :)) Think about it, how well do you know them? For such monotonous and flat conversations, you no longer seem to have common ground, except for the "angelic" grasses and powders. Sooo ... of course, men are quite quiet and uncommunicative at first, but even if you are close friends, and you can't say anything else - it's too much !!! I give you, congratulations, that you did not take their whims :) Ehh ... in essence, there is nothing to complain about! You have lost nothing, but you have not "gained" anything more! ... In my opinion, for now, you are not alienated and insecure, but if you do not take measures, you can become one. Give it positively, there is a reason, you are not alone :) You have her, and she will be by your side! And your friends may not have a girl like her by their side, or they may be alone! And they allow themselves a lot of arbitrariness, not trying to be what they are - grown up: D Not experienced childhood, it will be theirs !!! Look, the main problem is that without them, you feel like you've lost part of your place in the world, and that confuses you ... But lift your spirits a little, whatever they are, you certainly have a girl next to you. who loves you! :) And whatever they are, in their company, it's like you're alone ... Here's what I think is good to do! First, if you are not, to talk to your girlfriend, to share what's going on, it will be a little easier for you :) And it's nice for two to share. Then - why don't you look around for other people? ; D Go out with others! ... Change the situation a little, people! And as a piece of advice, don't linger too long at home that you will get depressed. And it's naughty. You have a girlfriend, go out with her somewhere, do something, enjoy each other :) Distract your thoughts :)) Communicate with them, but not too much! And if they ask what's going on, tell them directly what you see happening and what you don't like. If they are your friends, they will understand you. Friends are the ones who can tell you the truth in your eyes! ... ~ winterfire ~
Find normal friends with whom you have something in common and go out with them. It's really a little dumb to sit at home all the time ... go out more often with your girlfriend. Life is ahead of you!
And I'm in a similar situation, only I don't have a girlfriend, I advise you to find a hobby. It is a pity, but drugs and alcohol deform the human mind.