Hello. I am a 17 year old boy. And I've been in love with a girl for a while. She likes me too. We have known each other for almost 1 year. At first we were withdrawn, and then we started going out more regularly. I confessed to her that I liked her, after which she did the same. After a while we started kissing and hugging a lot. The problem is that I want us to be more than friends, but she doesn't want it. We've talked about it regularly, and she says she doesn't want it to interfere with our friendship because it's pretty big. We tell each other every day that we love each other and it really is. I'm already desperate and I don't know what to think. I don't want anyone else to be her friend and suffer. What to do? ...
Answers 5
If you've known each other for a year, no matter how great your friendship has been, at least 5 years would have been ok, but Ianche ... Apparently she just doesn't want you to leave and this is her excuse not to be angry with her otherwise.
A few questions about the girl: 1.) Did she have previous relationships (boyfriends, lovers, whatever)? 2.) What exactly did she tell you about you, what are you in her eyes (just a friend to share with or something more)? 3.) Did you ask her if she would have intimate desires for you? I'm trying to find out if you fall into the category of "just a good friend" or are afraid that she will lose you "due to old failures with other relationships." If she has had failed relationships before, she may be hurt and afraid to reconnect. In any case, you need to decide at the right time to talk to her and clarify your relationship. Also say how you feel so that he understands you.
Either he doesn't like you as a boy (but only as a person) and justifies himself, or (which is more likely) you have crossed the line that puts you in the "friend" category and that automatically lowers the opportunity to look at you as a potential partner . Therefore, care must be taken to show the intentions towards the woman in time, because then exactly these situations occur. Women do not like uninitiative men. This makes them feel unwanted. of course, you don't have to be too insistent in an ugly way. You have to hit the approach and the moment. There is no going back for you and there is nothing you can do. It is very difficult for him to look at you as a potential partner. You should have thought about this before you gained the fame of "just a friend".
Well, we have feelings, but it's too late for that. We became very close as friends. She did not have such connections and was hurt. He is afraid that something could happen that will completely ruin our relationship. She told me that if we weren't so close, everything would be fine and things would work out.
After friendship there is love, but after love there is no friendship. Do not spoil your friendship and do not press it. If she wants you to be more than friends, she will show. :)