Let me clarify that this is not a fictional story. The facts are real. I am 32 years old from the capital. I work in the field of advertising. I have a decent income. I have been divorced for several years with a child. I have my own home. I am 167 cm tall and weigh 56 kg. I have blond, long hair and blue eyes. In person, I wouldn't say I'm a model, but I'm not with the wrong, ugly features. In sex, I dare not claim to be like a porn star, but I would say that I am free. I have heard from some men that I belong to the so-called scoundrels. As a character I am something average. I am responsive, at times good-natured and a little naive, a little impatient, in case I am challenged I can become quite angry, screaming, insulting (this is a rarity). The problem is that I can't attract a man for a longer and more serious relationship. I've met men in different ages, with different professions, different social status, foreigners too. I have deliberately sought out men like me - with marriage behind my back and children. There were cases when I had sex on the first date, but there were also cases when we became intimate after months of acquaintance and courtship. I did not want material benefits from anyone. There have been cases where I myself insisted on paying for a vacation, dinner or a movie. However, I cannot and cannot attract anyone into my life. I don't think that having a child is a problem either. There is around me. many women have two or three children and have second marriages and serious relationships. In the beginning there is mutual liking, attraction, interest. Then something breaks on the other side and everything stops. It has even happened to me several times without getting to sex to push them away. I ask almost everyone I've been with what my problem is and everyone is silent. It wasn't me the problem and blah, blah. I work with a psychologist to increase self-confidence, but no results. I don't know what to really do. I have periods of 6-7 months, I rot and I don't go out with men, I don't have sex, I despair. It's not about looking for dating sites. I have contacts at my workplace. When I went out with company, I was even talked about on the streets and in the shops.
Answers 21
Well, you wrote it - you have low self-esteem and try to please men - have higher requirements for them, let them run after you. Or change the type of men you date.
Your whole presentation betrays a very mediocre mentality, maybe that's the reason. Why does a person need such a thing for a stable relationship? She was like a porn star in sex ... And she's proud. Well, you're right on top, nothing! Who wants a serious porn star girlfriend? And you have a child. What man with self-confidence and self-esteem needs one - to withstand the fruit of another's seed? Eventually you may catch a baby, but your child will never recognize him as a real parent.
Number 2 are you okay ?? There are so many people whose family relationships have collapsed over the years and they have divorced because they have children and should be left alone for the rest of their lives !? Tighten it up .. I bet you're a man - selfish and self-centered .. It's hard for you men to accept other people's children .. The author may have had to predispose them more in the last conversation to understand the reasons without looking pathetic and to relax to tell you. But if you really neglected yourself for everything and indulged in everything, if you felt low self-esteem, lack of pride and that you were tied in a towel for everything, ready to forgive anything, just don't be alone very repulsive .. I do not know if this is the situation think about it. Things will get better :)
Strange how to contact the lady
I'm a man of 26. Well, I only tell you from what I've read that I don't give you any chance. So she fucked whoever she fell for 10 years. Foreigners, Bulgarians on the first date, on the second date ... She was a porn star, you have a child. So what are you to me? What will you give me that a free woman cannot give me? Yes, I am selfish. Why watch a foreign child to whom I can't make a remark, because his mother will go into hysteria? Women just can't live alone. And you admit it, you will go crazy. There is a problem among men, if they are smart to never go out with a mother with a child. Because she plays it to the one in love and then the nonsense begins. You change completely when you live together, God forbid he lives in your apartment. Dobrich only, until you catch the man then it starts with the rush of "family" responsibilities. Hocking and how it is. "And don't behave like that with my child" ... Sorry chick, but listening to you made me quite disgusted.
Number 7, I was disgusted just reading you. And calmly go out with whatever you want, you will not become a smart man anyway ...
The author wrote that she is NOT like a porn star. At least read carefully before spitting.
Bulgarians flee from women with children like the devil from incense. You have examples, I have none. All divorced women I have known for years are alone. They don't even have links ...
Get used to living alone. Hardly any self-respecting man will take you.
Um, think about it, what man would want to fuck someone else's child? Only 32, and already divorced. This means that you are not a wife and you have already proved it. He is looking for a divorced uncle aged 45-50, with big children, who doesn't care that you have a child too. However, if you are looking for a 30-year-old IT with a salary of 10 vouchers to marry you and accept your child as his own, you have the wrong address.
I have such acquaintances as the author. They ran into the tinder for easy sex, made the number, and then roared that they could not keep a man. And they went to charlatans to "raise their self-esteem." The problem is rather that they can't really indulge in someone. They shared their feelings and that work back and forth, but it turns out that both are worn out. They smell cheap. This and the increased claims. As more experienced they have a basis for comparison and it is more difficult to please a man. Accordingly, men feel it. But instead of calming down, lowering the criteria, being more humble, they want to have higher self-esteem. Paragraph 22.
Nonsense. They give you a lot of stupid advice. Here are the complexes on the site. I am like you, but without a child and unmarried. Alone. Your main problem is that you are divorced with a child. Nobody wants such women. The second main problem is that you have criteria for a man, and those with second marriages do not. They catch themselves bald, fat, ugly, which they cook only if they are not alone. Your self-esteem is not low. It's normal for you. Your third problem is that you're sexy. In Bulgaria, people are simple and follow stereotypes. If you are beautiful and sexy, you are already a whore. It is harder for such women to prove that they are not. Every day you have to prove that you are not easy. Everyone is jealous of you, it's a complete horror.
I'm a man and I'm disgusted by most men's comments. I don't know, obviously the internet brings out the worst of us. I am 33 years old, my girlfriend is 31, divorced with two children. And I'm not a lollipop, I don't lack female interest. It just so happened that I fell in love with her. And I'm not sorry. Many marriages fail, and what if people accept it as a life sentence? Author, there is no way I can give an opinion on your question without knowing you. Maybe you can really try to ask for feedback. Call one of these men, but not immediately after the separation, but after a year, for example. Ask him for friendly advice. And say frankly, "Anyway, I'm not in love. We liked each other, but then it didn't work out. Tell me why, I'll have valuable feedback." I wouldn't refuse.
Hi, I'm a man and I've come across situations with women that I like at first, but then I see that something is wrong with their behavior and I want to end the relationship. Something in the way you behave is either you burden them or you don't give them priority and you expect them to comply with you or something like that.
You probably did not mention at all the possible reason for this to happen, simply because it is very difficult (even impossible) for a person to see objectively what in himself leads to these results. For example, you may be too big a stick (as they say in English - clingy) and start demanding more attention from the man early. Or you may be too cold - the other extreme. But certainly do not ask others what your problem is - it is best to talk to a psychologist about it. By the way, raising self-esteem doesn't happen "like that" ... it's years of work.
Hello, I would like to meet you, if you want, of course, a serious relationship and a man who will not leave you for nothing. Yes, it is brave of me to write such words, but I know who I am and what I am, it depends on you what you want to happen in your life from now on. I no longer live in Sofia, but here, where I am about an hour away from the capital, there is everything you need for a beautiful, peaceful and valuable life, even better than Sofia. It doesn't bother me that you have a child, as long as you want to have your own and be free from prejudices. mareid
There were no people, the woman has nothing, just Bulgarian men no longer want anything but casual sex, what a relationship, what a second marriage! It simply does not have adequate men for either the free or the divorced ... the situation is tragic. I'm divorced and I've already given up on the idea that I can have a relationship ... I look after my children and the peace and so on. The attitude I've been subjected to is kind of grateful for casual sex ... no, thanks. And I'm neither old, nor ugly, nor fat. Nobody gets involved! Not to mention how many single colleagues and girlfriends I have - unmarried, for years alone, already 40 years old ...
A man in his old age for serious relationships. And I'm like that and I find out why, I find out the problem, but it's hard to apply a different pattern of behavior. I'm impatient, it seems to me from afar that I want to, instead of giving in to what happened. They feel that you want a lot and they are afraid that you will want a lot from them, instead of letting the hireling go. Something like that, I have it too, I understand it, but when the moment comes and I forget what I know and I apply my weak experience. I think that for 1 time or 2 it should be VERY difficult for us to think about what to do without rushing, and without saying WOMAN WOMAN, and you WONDER MAN WITH THIS WILL HAPPEN, wait for me to show myself from now on . 1-2 times to do it, let's fix our posture and then it will come on its own, it's hard, I haven't been able to do it so far, not that I've tried, I just think I have to do it, it's not like that, and unknowingly forgetting what I was thinking, a girl appears a few days later to whom I can apply this new thinking of mine, but I have forgotten what I was thinking, and the thinking comes later from the subconscious we already use. I shoot the older model and get the same results, I say to myself "well, the next time it was" and only when I forget then I have a new chance and everything repeats itself. I need something inside to annoy me, to make me more serious, to accept that I am more important than her, even though I liked her and to be ready to pull from time to time, not to give everything at once and become uninterested or scare them. and thinking comes later from the subconscious we already use. I shoot the older model and get the same results, I say to myself "well, the next time it was" and only when I forget then I have a new chance and everything repeats itself. I need something inside to annoy me, to make me more serious, to accept that I am more important than her, even though I liked her and to be ready to pull from time to time, not to give everything. at once and become uninterested or scare them. and thinking comes later from the subconscious we already use. I shoot the older model and I get the same results, I say to myself again "well, next time it was" and only when I forget then I have a new chance and everything repeats itself. I need something inside to annoy me, to make me more serious, to accept that I am more important than her, even though I liked her and to be ready to pull from time to time, not to give everything at once and become uninterested or scare them.
Most of the comments are a complete tragedy, these were my men .... Women were easy-nice, but you men are not complicated? Just for the sex stuff, and you can't even do it like people do, and then you say what you wouldn't take. You foresters :)
Is it possible to show affection from an early age and talk to them about a serious relationship? In general, when it comes to this, people are repulsed. Things have to happen on their own. If that's the case, just accept that your life isn't so bad, after all, if it happens, it happens, if it doesn't. Give yourself time, don't work hard, no one is chasing you. And yet the idea is to find a valuable man to love and he will love you and your child, not just someone who will want to stay. If that's not the reason, I'm sorry, but I don't think I can think of another. And I can't believe it's because of the child, because they start a relationship with you and they know about the child from the very beginning. And I hope you don't pay attention to the vicious comments, I really don't know where such malice towards everyone comes from. Do not take it personally, under every topic it is so. People come here for some advice, and they receive only reproach and malice. I don't think there's anything he said that made a bad impression on me. The truth is, we don't know much about you, so keep your head up and I hope everything works out for you, whether with or without a man.
It is possible to show your emotions and attitude towards men too strongly and hastily. To understand that you are in love and have expectations, and for them to move at a different pace and not be ready. The same thing happened to me recently. I liked a man who was looking for a warm and cordial relationship, a woman who could give it to him, but there was no maturity in his behavior and no real readiness for such a relationship. When he realized that I had feelings, it was over. Otherwise, I'm in the same situation - divorced for five years. During this time I had only one intimate relationship about 3 years ago. The last man and I did not have an intimate relationship, although I wanted to. When I look at them, they are both looking for the right one, but they just jump from relationship to relationship. (I'm talking about intelligent men with older children) This is too exhausting for me. So, that my advice to you is to be a little more picky. Don't show feelings! Give yourself some rest and when you least expect the right one will show up. Just choose them more carefully. Maybe I have a little more conservative understanding, but you can't sleep with someone on the 2-3rd meeting and expect that you will be able to have a serious relationship with such a person. Good luck and head up!