Hello, I am 26 years old and I am from a small town (25 thousand inhabitants). In small towns, almost everything is known and people are discussed. They keep saying behind my back that I am irresponsible, lazy and not working. In principle, people's opinion does not concern me, but recently my friend's father also asked her if I would start a normal job. This provoked me the most to write this topic. But in general I am uncomfortable hearing the same things all the time, from anyone, it burdens me mentally. For 4 years I have been developing something like a small business of my own, importing products from a specific niche from Japan. In the beginning I did not earn almost anything, but in the last 2 years things have developed and on average I earn between BGN 900 and 1500 per month, which is great for our small town even if I am not married yet. Separately 2 times a week I do courses with one truck, from this I receive additional income. I also go to lectures twice a week for my second master's degree. I also help my father with his tasks, so it's not like I don't do anything. In fact, 90% of my work in my small business is done from my phone or laptop. I like to go hiking often, and I spend 2 hours a day in the gym, there are the most comments. They are like "let me lie down and search *** all day and I will train so much", "there are no problems with my head for hanging here" and many others. Separately, I feel very uncomfortable when I see someone I see once a week because he lives elsewhere, his first question is "Did you start somewhere?" Or "Will you get a job?" And mischievous smiles. Also, the intonation shows that it is for a mocking purpose. These questions have been annoying me lately, and I tell them that if I start something, they will be the first to understand, to stop asking me. Even a few days ago, my mother's cousin, who lives in Germany, called me for my birthday and the first thing, after congratulating me, was to ask me if I didn't think about getting a job ... I'm talking to someone on various topics and at some point he always says "well, if you don't have a lot of time" and various other such stories.
I pay my insurance, I have a registered company, everything is legal for me, I don't see what I'm doing wrong. I have to be pretty bad to give up everything and get a job somewhere for less money. I think those who speak behind my back, if they have the opportunity and they will take advantage, who is to blame for them not even studying, or if they have not invented something and have to do hard physical work or are locked in an office all day. There are rich sons in the city who only spend and do nothing, drive expensive cars. Everyone behaves well with them and is flattered, no one asks them when they will work. From the age of 19, until I started my current occupation, I was a freelance programmer, then there were no comments because I went to lectures every day.
Answers 18
If I was tied to everything I've heard about me, I'd hang myself 20 times. Whatever you do, their mouths will not stop. Don't give an ear and so much.
Amy, just tell them that you have your own business and you don't need to look for another job;) And to the sarcastic comments, answer: "Why? Are you jealous?" and so much. Do not care :)
There is a terribly simple answer - envy. According to some people, if you don't go to work from 8 to 5 and don't swear at it every day, you are a complete loser. They don't think it can be done any other way. Cattle. Do not pay attention to them.
People's mouths have never heard that you should tie them ... so that you don't fall asleep.
Oh disgusting enviers and villains. We are very bad in this Bulgaria. I guess they're the lazy ones, not you. Just don't be influenced, but gram!
This forum is a living example. Let's say I've achieved a lot in my career. And if for some reason, I share it here, I'm not talking to say neither in a wedge, nor in a sleeve or to parade, immediately there is someone among the commenters to get annoyed. It's just that some people are the ninth hole in the flute and want others to be like them in the swamp, to calm their conscience a little, that they are not the only ones in the pigsty. And accordingly, when they see that someone is not like them and it starts with irony, insults and similar unpleasant things. Especially in Bulgaria envy is especially respected. I have traveled 10-15 countries and I have never seen such malice and envy anywhere, I swear. Not that there are no bad people in other countries, but if there are 5%, there are 95.
Number 3 answered you the most accurately. I think you guessed it too, but to be safer and to calm down, you asked here. Yes it is! In your case, most of you are envious and that is why they are supposed to make fun of you in order to calm down from their envy and malice. The rest, like sheep, accept what they have heard from the former as pure coin, and that is why you have heard more serious insinuations. Your girlfriend's father, naturally as a concerned father, hearing what is said about you is normal to react like that. However, this does not mean that he is right. So, in my opinion, you are giving a damn to the envious and their sheep, because I am convinced by what you describe that they are in fact a mockery of their miserable salaries and "a lot of your mind". And if you listen to them, you will become like them. And explain to your friend's father that you're making a good income for now, and if things go awry, then you're ready to get started. After all, a job is made up for you, it brings you money, not to report activity to others and prove how hard you work. Why? Who are they to judge you? You are currently working for yourself and earning money to meet your needs. And you don't have to explain to anyone how you live, what you do, etc. And if your girlfriend's father doesn't understand you and continues to be impudent to find a job, then there is an option for him to envy you. For example, why you and not him? Remember, you don't have to please anyone. Ask yourself, if he were you, if he would please you. And the most important! Live your life with the money you earn with the work you have invented and the freedom you have to be your own boss and not care at all. You already have clear arguments, that you are absolutely right about yourself. You rightly think that others in your position would take advantage of the same situation. But for their greatest content, you are so lucky. Moreover, you have achieved it yourself, and nowadays in Bulgaria, for which I truly admire and congratulate you. Good luck in the future !!! ; )
6, I am personally irritated only by your contemptuous attitude. I would not be annoyed by what you have achieved, what you have, or the fact that you have shared it. I would be annoyed by a statement or a hint that everyone who is "in the swamp" was to blame, etc. There is nothing wrong with sharing how it happened specifically to you, how much effort it cost you, but to draw conclusions and summaries for everyone else it is insulting. This probably prompts some people to write "annoying" comments. Not that there aren't generally envious ones, but that's separate.
8, I have never written it in a contemptuous tone and the author also does not claim such a thing, does not even mention to people that he has a business at least according to what is written. But when I encounter such an attitude, I react contemptuously. Not that I think so - everyone according to their abilities, but when you don't have them, at least don't attack only out of envy. this is annoying, not that one has not attained and should be considered inferior. But to envy and attack just because of that is already baseness.
Author, how do you know "and canines", as they say, and do not know that you have a company? And 25,000 people is not such a small town that everyone knows you and is interested in how your life is going and what you do during the day. I'm sorry, but this (as well as a lot of topics lately) seems to me to be biased, that many people think that money is made like this ...
From 8 to 9, this "everyone according to their abilities, but when you don't have them" is negligible.
10, 11, if you accept it tendentiously and contemptuously, then you have a problem with yourself, not with the successful ones.
Author, read again 8/10/11. I think that answers your question perfectly. it only confirms what I and others have said under the pretext that we have been negligent. When a person is stuck in front of him, everything seems to be neglected and he looks for it where there is none. Others turn it into irony, others into nagging, etc., but in all cases there is envy and the inferiority complex.
Thanks for the comments, sometimes one needs to hear such things, nothing that the forum is anonymous, with acquaintances can no longer be shared, rarely remained, such as you do not gossip later. 10, I did not say that absolutely everyone knows me, nor that they know everything about me. They just look at me that I have free time and do not fail to tell me. They know I'm doing something, of course, but they don't know what, I still don't have to explain, nor have I flaunted anything. Most people think that I write various things in a chat-pat, I'm a software developer by education and I get something from there. In this forum, whatever you post, there is still a problem, why should I bother to write the topic so that someone thinks that money is easy to make? Plus, I didn't say I make them easy, I just don't have a fixed work schedule. Sometimes they would gather on my laptop for 12-13 hours a day, and there are some problems. Number 7, thanks for the comment. He is a father and in fact has not had a "normal job" all his life. He did different things and there were times when he did literally nothing. I was annoyed when she told me what he had asked. As a matter of fact, as mentioned in the comments above, they really hate their job. They keep cursing their bosses and talking against them. Otherwise, I don't think that if I say I'm doing something, the comments will stop, I guess I should, I just don't pay attention. I have to get used to doing it, because I have the bad trait of being burdened by people's talk and irritating me, I spend too much unnecessary time on them. Otherwise, these same people flatter the sons of various local rich people, they dare not ask what they are doing. It's a pity.
For a person who works from 8 am to 5 pm every day, it is very difficult to accept that someone else earns the same or more money while staying at home in front of a computer screen. People know that the company exists, but they don't see you going around institutions like crazy, harassing bills or anything like that. The first reaction is not to believe that you are busy with certain activities that have never been present in their lives and they do not understand. And I do not understand, I have acquaintances with companies, but they do not stop there. The fact is that their activity is different from yours and they do not have much choice. Either they have a shop, or a service center or something similar that requires you to monitor the staff and be present at the site. This is the whole problem, people do not understand your activities and deny them easier. Of course, there must be units that are aware of things, but they envy or indulge in negative emotions and become angry. In general, the gossip is spread because people did not go your way with your shoes. They don't realize that your job doesn't have an office, that you don't have workers and it's all up to you. There is no point in justifying yourself and giving explanations, much less getting angry. If it bothers you so much that you say you have your own company and your job is different from theirs, that's it. Don't expect someone to count the 2 days of the week you're in the truck or lecturing. Two days against the background of 7, for a person with 5/7 is difficult to take seriously. Every acquaintance will ask you what you do. People do it out of habit, not specifically to spoil your mood. I am constantly asked if I am still studying, if I work, where I live, what I do. Come to think of it, I also ask acquaintances,
If you can change the environment, do not pay attention to them, of course they envy. Well done to you, keep up the good work!
Thanks for the comments 15, 16 Number 15, you're right, really do not understand. Otherwise, I have a detour, though. I go to customs to clear shipments, a lot of time is wasted there, I go to the bank almost every day, as well as to the couriers, separately if some of the things need service I drive them to Sofia. Quite often I meet people who buy physically, not online. But when people see me in the hall at 4 o'clock and they can't understand what I did all day before, I was lying at home for them. Of course, some talk out of envy. I will work on not being so influenced. These people, seeing you bond, oppress you even more. Otherwise, 2 in lectures and two in the truck gather 4, it's not whole days, but still ... Nobody teases them on the weekends, my phone rings dozens of times every day. You're also right about asking someone out of habit,
Are you crazy dude to care about that at all? I've been going to work all my life, I'm 35 years old and I've been wondering for a few months now, what to start doing, how can I not go to work in the sense of not having a boss. What you do is really enviable, and I have acquaintances who do some such tricks and are much happier than me. Do what you do better than that, and you don't care what others say about you, let them go to work.