Hello! I know I'm not the only one, there are similar topics ... and people with real problems, but it will be easier for me to share my thoughts here and read different opinions. I am a student at 22, I am graduating this year. What weighs on me the most is that I've always been alone - so many men around me, but never a relationship. At the risk of being verbose, for which I apologize, I will try to explain how I got here and describe myself as accurately as possible. I am very positive, always smiling, a party girl, with a sense of humor and a lot of friends with whom I go out all the time. I study, work, meet people and I am financially independent. I have wonderful parents who have given me a good upbringing and I have never missed anything but a person next to me. I am a completely normal girl, I look good ... I am very liked, but it is never mutual! In a problematic situation, guilt is never one-sided, so I started looking for it in myself. I found new friends, I started to diversify the places where I go out, to play sports ... And in the end I always like the ones I can't have! And those who want me do not attract me in any way - I thought I was exaggerating that it can not be so with everyone, but it really is not a whim ... just when you do not like someone, no matter how good and to be a valuable person, it is not possible by force! Not to mention the fact that until last year I was a virgin and totally desperate, I thought this was my big problem ... here it is not. Then quite by chance at sea I met the cousin of my best friend, who did not even I knew it existed. We fit together perfectly from the first day, it was infinitely nice, I couldn't even believe that something good was happening to me!
BUT .. It turned out that he was studying abroad and was in Bulgaria only for the summer. When I found out, I decided to back off because I was caught like a drowning man on a straw again ... I got even worse! I thought he was just another one who wanted to sleep with me, but to my surprise, it wasn't. He even congratulated me on the fact that despite the opportunities I have to sleep with someone for an evening or two, I have not taken advantage of them. So from July to the end of August we did not separate from each other, we were together every day, we got to know each other very well until it was time for him to leave in September. Then I began to think that I would never meet another such boy, and now it's time for me, so I decided to do it with him. I wanted it a lot, of course, but I felt more like a deal, a way to get rid of this desolate virginity ... At first, when I told him, he was very surprised and flatly refused, on the grounds that he was leaving, and I did not deserve it. However, he did not know that although in his eyes, this was bad - something better for me than having someone to share my feelings with, it had not happened to me ...
He also wanted it very much and could not fight with yourself. We did it and for a second I do not regret that I chose this person, I had never imagined him better! After he left, however, everything went on as before ... I don't know what to do anymore, I try not to make it a fixed idea to have a relationship, to have fun, and to live my life ... I know that I am young, not to mention small even if there are passengers for each train and I will probably meet someone too .. but in the meantime, this loneliness weighs terribly on me, I don't show it to others, but there is no day at home when I don't cry because otherwise, this stress will end me: / Please, give me some advice on what to do to change things ... or at least tell me where I'm wrong. Thanks in advance!
Answers 8
Hello. It writes to you, boy, your age. Once again, I am convinced that there is not much difference between women and men. We are all people or more precisely we are all living beings, we have something unique in us, souls or whoever wants to call it there. But everyone has something in him that makes him feel, love, desire, long, give himself to the people he loves, and want to be loved, and understood, and so on. In recent years, I have the same problem as you, with the difference that I am a boy. I keep falling in love with the wrong girls, so to speak. Or just somehow fate does not want to be with them. So, since there is already a topic similar to yours, posted by another boy, I decided to give him some advice. And since the problem is the same, no matter the girls, I think you can read his topic and the advice from me and the others below. I've just been thinking about this topic, and I've come to some conclusions, and in order not to write everything from the beginning, I'll give you a link to that topic. In short, there are many lonely people like us. Good people who really want the best for the person against us, but can't find a suitable one to share their feelings with and to love and be loved. Perhaps destiny deliberately confronts us with these difficulties in order to teach us something to teach us a lesson. I don't know, maybe we are the ones who fall in love with the wrong people, and that's where it all starts. I don't know, but I know that loving is good. It may not be shared love, you may suffer but it is still something. I believe that one day I will find the girl who will share my feelings without doubting anything. That he will be the person I am looking for and longing for. It will just take time to find it. Sam21 :) http: // share. net / 4 / story-37539. html
Darling, there is no recipe for this. It's just LUCK. Sometimes I forget immersed in various activities, overworked and tell myself that it is not a pain to die. But when a holiday comes, it suddenly cuts me off again and I start to feel sorry for myself. I repeat to myself those nonsense that God keeps us alone because he protects us for a certain person and until he appears we have to improve that for each train there are passengers and that it is better alone than with a shoe I can't stand. .. but these are years full of loneliness, dozens of holidays spent in chirping and hoping that the next year at this time will not be so ... but alas, the same thing again. I have another annoying problem that I see my ex-friends happy, with other women obviously better than me, obviously better than me ... and they see me again alone and year after year in despair. It's from me I didn't help much, I just wanted to tell you that it all depends on fate. Good luck darling! F24
People tighten up. Some are destined to meet the right one in time. Sometimes the most frivolous things come out of the most frivolous things. Just stop thinking about it, take it as a chance to develop yourself without distracting you. Travel, party, because when you start a family it becomes a little harder to do these things. Live now so that in time you will not be angry that you have missed something from your youth.
From the author: Thank you for the answer! I will review the topic :)
Hi, I'm a boy, although much younger than you (I'm 17), but a lot of things happened to me and life taught me a lot. I'm the same way, I don't know not that I lack attention, there are a lot of girls who like me and I can be with them and do it (I'm still a virgin, what to do), but somehow that's not the problem . The problem is that I'm not attracted to most and I've been alone for a long time, but I fell in love with a girl who turned out to be exactly the person I could spend a good part of my life with. She made more than a good impression on me. Unfortunately, as I see it, she doesn't respond with the same, but she knows my feelings for her, and she's just a very strange person ... maybe if we leave I will feel very happy, but no ... Life is a nasty thing that I have to "cheat" it so to speak, because no matter how much I play in an honest way, it never happens ... This loneliness eats me up and I can't do anything. But somehow you have to swallow all the feelings and things and move forward, to stand up. You don't have to think about it, know that one day without much searching, love will come by itself. Also look around, because the people who may be perfect for you are around you. And remember - a person falls in love only once with a person, never falls in love the second time with the same.
As the light comes on, the problem exists even with good social contacts ... with the young girl in this case. The colleague mentioned above that we are all living beings and we carry something identically encoded in ourselves that makes us unique, ie different. In order to increase the possibility of finding what we are looking for, we must give it a chance and it will find us. And the most casual with behavior that shows the real thing in our country, not how we would like to look in the eyes of the one we are looking for. Pride, hidden feelings or shame of confession - forget it! boldly show yourself, open yourself to be found and recognized, it sounds stereotypical - be yourself, because as I said everyone is unique and the like will be easier to find without masks. A simple example - if you like someone, show them, do not hide it, do not go against your nature.
Hello! I am 21 years old. Ever since I was a child, I have always wanted a serious person next to me, a person I can trust, who understands and supports me. I was in an environment where the boys had no basic upbringing. I have also come across those who manage to turn your head well. They understand what you are looking for and try to be just that. But sooner or later it is understood what the person really is. I have been deceived more than once, because my desire to have a soulmate next to me was very strong. Of course I was small, but I knew what I wanted. I was 17 when I came across a boy who was just right for me. I was crazy, I was finally happy. I longed so much for that moment. Yes, but there is no complete happiness. There were things I didn't like about him at all, but there are no perfect people. I also have shortcomings. I could accept him as he was. Things developed so that we lived together. But he was very jealous, if he could, he would keep me locked up. I never gave him cause for jealousy. But he was just such a man, obviously. His sheer jealousy eventually led to a lot of quarrels over nonsense. The glass overflowed and no matter how hard it was for me, I ended our relationship. The first 2 days I felt very bad, I wondered if I was wrong, if I shouldn't have given him a chance and fixed things, nothing that we tried many times and it didn't work out. It didn't take him long to catch another. This act of his set me free. I was relieved, but I felt lonely again. I had the opportunity to commit, but I was not ready. Half a year after our separation, I met a boy who obviously liked me, but I still couldn't shake off my past. Honestly, I liked his friend more than he did. He did not give up, he called me, texted me, constantly asked us to go out, take a walk or go to a cafe. I didn't particularly want it, given that I felt it wasn't for me. There was no thrill. Once we went to a disco, there I had drunk more and he kissed me and I answered him. Nothing again. The next day I was upset that I had given him vain hopes. I wondered how to explain to him that this was a mistake. I couldn't tell him anything, I still couldn't clarify my feelings on my own. He was very kind, patient and clearly responsible. I decided that I would lose nothing if we tried, although I had great doubts that it would work. It turned out that the more I got to know him, the more I liked him. We have been together for a year and 2 months now, we love each other and we understand each other very well. :) With this whole soap, which I wrote I want to say that sometimes the feelings we feel in the beginning can deceive us. One may think that he has found the one with whom he wants to spend his life, but after some time spent with him, this may not be the case at all. And vice versa. It is really not easy to find the right person, but in order for this to happen, we must first accept him as he is. With his pros and cons. If we can't do that, then finding a mate will be extremely difficult. we must first accept it as it is. With its pros and cons. If we can't do that, then finding a mate will be extremely difficult. we must first accept it as it is. With its pros and cons. If we can't do that, then finding a mate will be extremely difficult.
From the author: 7, I understand what you mean, but I get something else without being influenced by side factors! Physically, not only do I not like them, but some even repel me, even though I know they are decent guys. On the other hand, I think that every character is prone to change under the influence of feelings, and that would never stop me from at least trying to get to know someone, despite incompatibilities or differences in the beginning. But I just can't distort my soul that I don't need the person to like my appearance and attract me. If this is present, but the person is not worth it, we are again spinning in the vicious circle. Here's how the most natural thing in the world can turn into a real complication. I hope it's true that there are passengers for every train ... and I hope my man doesn't travel to me with BDZ;)))