I'm writing you a very annoying problem that never comes out of my head ... "girls", I'm so desperate that I feel like a rag. For me: 24 years old from a small town, I deal with online trade, in general my work allows me to have too much free time .. I also have hobbies, sports, fitness .. computers .. I graduated with a master's degree in Economics at the beginning of this year. I tried to try a new job just to change my city and attitude a little bit, but once, a second time ... To the problem: I've always been shy, my experience with girls has always been limited to conversations / dumps or with classmates or colleagues or just general sayings. I never got there before, I'm always worried and even if I like a girl and I want to talk to her, I go to her and just talk to her and I've already passed her. (I last did it two days ago, a girl I had seen 2-3 times, I had tried to write to her and I saw her outside, but I swallowed my tongue again) It's as if someone is holding my neck and telling me don't do not do .. the feeling I feel I can define it as some fear or scared. I'm not the type of user or hypocrite. I'm an honest and principled person, which I'm only proud of, although in most cases I'm always Patya ... I'm not looking for a girl for one night or just for fun. I don't know, obviously I have quite outdated value thoughts about a girl with whom you can go out, share, spend your time, be loved, love, fall in love ... When you think about what money and houses and vacations are for you, if not to be able to share them with a real person. I have tried dozens of times to write to a girl, but always without an answer, they don't even read ..
And someone writes to me herself, uff off, off .. even just by the way to write a line ... a pathetic story. It is very rare to get in common company with other girls, or they are friends of my friends or just not ... in the end a common acquaintance to meet someone, because it is obvious that it is difficult for me and I realize it and I can not do nothing on that. I don't consider myself handsome, I can't define it, but judging by the fact that no girl paid attention to me, not even at least one hello or just a smile ... I'm obviously a big killer, unfortunately. In general, my life was not very difficult, but neither was it very pleasant to go through ... Even when I go out, be it to a cafe, restaurant, disco, beach, this feeling of loneliness presses me and I don't really have fun, I don't I relax, even if I laugh, I'm actually sad and bored inside. I don't know what to do,
Answers 6
Lack of attention from the opposite sex crushes you. I'm on the same track right now. It's good that I have some gifts otherwise ... And again the lack of courage closes many doors for me. It's a trauma for me. Severe beating and infidelity by my only longtime friend. From then on, I became cowardly, and my charisma disappeared along with my hair. Before, I was not deprived of attention at all. I tell you this in order to understand where the problem is rooted. Personally, I suffer a lot, I do not dare to look anyone in the eye on the street, so that there is no conflict. Everyone around me thinks I'm very busy. But I am far from the truth. I personally cannot find a solution to the problem. I wonder about a psychologist, but I'm skeptical. Hopefully the topic showed interest in people who have fought.
I am very sad for you. The site constantly publishes similar stories, it's amazing how many young boys are in the same situation as you. There was a similar story once and I don't remember if the author explained or was one of the comments, but they had shared how to overcome this fear more easily. The boy in question explained how little by little he began to try to relax in conversations with girls by asking them simple questions. I give you examples, you walk down the street, you see, say, a pretty girl, and you go to ask her what time it is, explaining that your phone battery has dropped, for example. Or another situation, you shop in a big store, you see a pretty girl again and you go to her with a question about where, for example, something is in the store. I'm giving you these banal examples, not to say stupid ones, but you get the idea I guess. The point is not that when you ask what time it is, you will immediately arrange a meeting with the girl. This will aim to overcome the fear in question and see that there is nothing to worry about in the girls. There is nothing scary about talking to a girl. Start like this, ask banal questions, if they just answer you without interest, say thank you and leave. If you feel even a slight joke in the tone of their answer, make a joke. It can happen that you even start a conversation. But don't rush, start less and you will see for yourself how you will start to relax. Good luck :) ask banal questions, if they just answer you without interest, say thank you and leave. If you feel even a slight joke in the tone of their answer, make a joke. It can happen that you even start a conversation. But don't rush, start less and you will see for yourself how you will start to relax. Good luck :) ask banal questions, if they just answer you without interest, say thank you and leave. If you feel even a slight joke in the tone of their answer, make a joke. It can happen that you even start a conversation. But don't rush, start less and you will see for yourself how you will start to relax. Good luck :)
Lack of self-confidence is a problem. The girls feel it. You are still 24 years old. Only! Don't sleep at all, but you need to move a little. Looking for friends, acquaintances, classmates or university colleagues. You need to keep more contacts and not close. Look for places where there are more people and do not hesitate to talk and ask. Dress better and maintain your appearance. It is important. It will not be bad to train and keep fit. Looking for common companies ... Or options for traveling with your acquaintances. Whether for a vacation, or in the mountains or something like that. Buy a car. It doesn't have to be new or very expensive. But to be clean and maintained. You don't have to stay only in the small town. Think a little about changing jobs or jobs. It's not that scary ... I wish you success!
to 3 by the Author: It really sounds like a good "challenge" if I may call it that, through the conversations I have daily with people on the phone mainly and sometimes live at another job, I absolutely never worry, but does it matter for a girl I immediately start spinning in a circle (mentally). Even with my friend and his girlfriend I am worried sometimes (we are talking about general talk), except at certain moments when you get the conversation and you do not stop talking ... In two weeks I have an option for a bigger break and I will try to experiment during this time with such conversations as you mentioned above. The point is, even if I relax a little and end up getting even more depressed, I just don't think about when I'm working or doing something related to work the other time I'm out,
Hello and drive boldly forward from me the best option in your case is for someone to introduce you to a single woman already ask a friend from school or university try to share your problem with your best acquaintance and ask him for help to introduce you to his acquaintances
From the Author: Please direct me how to deal with a girl .. I have known her for probably 2-3 years, whenever I see her (max 10 times a year) we always answer, hello how are you and the conversation stops there ... Always has a wide smile as he looks at me too. 3 years ago I tried to find her on the Internet, it turned out that she had a friend and I didn't even try to write to her .. Since I was out of town for a year, I hadn't even seen her from afar, just I had amazed her .. until the beginning of this year I come across her very often .. ... as far as I understand she no longer has a friend ... The other day while writing exactly this topic I thought of her, I think I can talk to her like people, to invite her out and hop the next day I spotted her twice with the car, waved at me, greeted her and passed. Then in the evening I went out to the Park and just lined up at a chat and who to see in front of me The same girl, she turned herself and spoke to me, I asked her how she was, what she was doing, if she was still working ... this was the conversation .. My question is how to approach her, I want to give an invitation to a meeting, I want to write to her, how to do it, I'm afraid, full of horror, I'm afraid to be rejected, I'm afraid of what I think it's just in my head ... and she's just a girl who just: greets (high general culture) and doesn't have such thoughts that I have, namely to like her, to want to get to know her ... to want to go out. the girl is 3 years younger than me, she studies and works (works !!! - it's just impressive) completely natural, various muffin performances and I really like it .. I don't know if fate has anything to do with it, but you haven't seen it man about a month, two,