Will He Come Back?-minnesotawild

   He has to look for you, not just look for him. If only you press on him, you will become annoying to him and it is as if you are praying to him. Don't cover it at all for a few weeks, a month or two or three and just watch the seira if and when it will think of you. I do so, I let them look for me. In the beginning I did like you, but over the years I stopped. If he needs me, he knows very well how to find me. Everyone wants to come back, so far it has not happened to me that someone has not tried. Whether out of loneliness, or it's just past them, but they come back. People, if you ignore them long enough, curiosity begins to bother them. What do you do, do you see someone, do you sleep, have you forgotten them. A panicky fear begins that they may be forgotten and you may be happy with someone else. And a guarantee will look for you, because that's how we humans are arranged. The question is, is it worth it to be with such a jealous, immature man,

   I think you made a stupid mistake and made the same mistake! I understand it, if he doesn't look for you, the strain is writing to your ex, obviously there is something otherwise you wouldn't keep a chat. You better leave him if he wants to look for you

   He was stubborn ... and what are you ... didn't you learn your mistake the first time? !! It hurts .. it really hurts what you do ... women don't think, then tears, pleas .... come on travel ...

   Even if you get together, trust is already irretrievably broken. You acted very stupidly. What's the point of chatting with your ex when you love your boyfriend and know he's annoyed. The wheel turns, remember. Maybe one day you will see your boyfriend chat with another woman. How would you feel?

   I would not be with such a man. Not that I would like it if my boyfriend wrote to his ex, but to hit because of it? And imagine how it will limit you more and more and you will finally feel how you live a prison life and you will wonder how to get out, but mentally you will not be able to!

   You made a nasty mistake, but it's fixable. His behavior is that of an injured person and shows that he has invested a lot of feelings in you, and you have made you lose his trust. There is no doubt that he loves you. This is not about jealousy, but about undermining trust, and most likely about your unfinished old relationship and his fear of loss (in this case founded). But you can also make him chronic jealous. Trust in a relationship is built for a long time and is based on devotion to a person. The peculiarity of trust is that it is not trust that breeds trust, but long-term loyalty on the part of one builds trust in the soul of the other. It was stupid to write to your ex because you put your relationship with your current boyfriend on the line and you both lose because of one thrill or whatever you feel there when you write to your ex. Furthermore, if your partner is smart enough, your lie will not go undetected. You can't just blame him: why are you digging into my phone? Because, yes, he dug into your phone, but he found something that proves your disloyalty, in other words, you were caught at the crime scene. From a moral point of view, your immoral actions justify his immoral means. Or whatever called, called. You have to decide what you want. At your crossroads. Do you want to get the man back to you? If the answer is yes, then you have to take the first step, make a compromise with your ego and persevere, because you are the one with the shoot. It's good if you realize you're wrong. If you don't realize it, there's no way. Number 1 is right that people are coming back. Human connections are like rubber bands. If one end moves away, the other returns. But since people are not rubber bands, they do not return the same - this is important to understand! The relationship will not be the same, because the returnee will not have exactly the same thoughts and feelings towards you after a serious conflict. Yes, he may return because of his strong feelings and you will be the "winner" and you may triumph internally, but the returnee, so to speak, the "swallower", will not forget his humiliation from the incident. Believe me, the incident will remain an ulcer in your relationship - an unresolved issue, a reason for mistrust, which will hover like a ghost again and again. Such a game of withdrawal works in the initial stages of a relationship, but after a conflict is to be avoided. This is what number 1 has not clarified. If you're wrong, but you're waiting for him to fix what happened, it doesn't work. The connection after that is not very stable. If you really want it back, here's what you can do. First, don't listen to your girlfriends! And don't play games! If you listen to someone at all, listen to the other and understand his point of view, or at least try. Don't call him just to try the soil and ask how he is or if he loves you - it's stupid and can make him more angry. Why? Because in his ears it sounds like: I remain the holy water not drunk, and did it pass you at last, did you stop sulking. But mainly because you don't touch on the essence of the problem, which in this case is your relationship with your ex (whatever it is) and the fact that your friend has caught you in a lie, a shoot, a cover-up, or whatever you call it. The essence of the problem in the specific situation is your actions and behavior - this is what you need to discuss and clarify with the other. You have a chance to make things right, but it depends mainly on you, because I repeat, it is your fault. Don't try to justify your action, but by no means. You need to talk to him and you to clarify your motives, to understand yourself, to reveal your true feelings, needs and desires towards your ex to your current friend, to accept your guilt and to apologize sincerely. What do you want from the current one? You have to be honest with yourself and with him! This will not happen all at once, because he will not receive you with open arms at once, but you will need perseverance and effort. At your insistence, you should see and speak at least a few times. And most importantly, you have to answer the question, is the person on the other side worth it, do I really want to be with him for a long time and is he worth the effort. This is probably the most important of all. What hit you is not good. But it is also relative, because men work out emotional overload physically, hitting and screaming, and women verbally, insulting, manipulating and tearing. Men are not able to react (meaningfully) verbally, and women do not do it so physically, but some are real tigers, and this leads to great misunderstandings about who is what and whether he is like that. At this stage it is not clear whether he is jealous. If your answer for yourself is yes, I want with it, then start. I guarantee you that your efforts will not go unnoticed. And on three levels. One, making an effort, the barriers of the other will fall sooner or later (as I said he loves you). Two, hey, this chick really likes me and is ready to fight for me. So it's really worth it. This is a very serious conclusion on the part of a man, you know! Women, where their fingers do not move for the relationship and are just waiting for the man to shovel them, and you are the one who, as you see, fights. Not to push him, but to fight for the relationship, the difference is huge. Three, but if this babe is so eager to continue, then I really have a price, and more than the former - it will raise his self-esteem, which in this case was ruined. There is a great chance that after such a revelation, you two will become more friendly than ever. But it won't be easy for you in the beginning. In short: 1. Without hesitation. Explain clearly and simply that you want to continue. You sit in the driver's seat from now on and take the initiative for at least a month or two. 2. You realize your mistake and sincerely apologize to him. But sincerely. (Ask him to apologize for hitting you. It shows that you are serious and that you set boundaries. He has already set his own for you. ) Drive slowly, but very slowly and constantly. Don't rush.

   I am a man in a similar situation and I will tell you my experience in my case did not write to each other and sat down for coffee in a common company, I asked directly, she began to dodge but then, admitted, I said the following words former in the present no, if once again something like this happened to me you became my ex and so for many years we live peacefully with her, she obviously understood that for men the only thing left for us is dignity and any contact with people with whom you have been intimate are unacceptable

   And what is he looking for you for? To read your chats with your ex? To keep lying to him? Well, the man left you to chat calmly, keep going when you can't stop and it's so important to you! And it's not a matter of stubbornness or a big ego, it's called SELF-RESPECT. Something you miss. Just as you lacked respect for your friend, you lacked honesty when you lied to him, he lost his trust in you, and without him there is no connection. If he is a man, he will no longer forgive you or look for you. You did not deserve his love. The feelings and dignity of people are not a toy for various simple, frivolous muffins.

   This is about trust! And that, trust, is everything!

   He's looking for an excuse to dump you. If you loved him very much, would you dump him for a chat with your ex?

   Go to number 7 of 1 I liked your comment, there is a lot of truth. But the other must work to mend the relationship, not just one to fight the wind. One takes a step, so does the other. I was like the author - and I called, wrote, explained, apologized and so on. And opposite-wall. Either he didn't pick up and answer messages, or I never heard him apologize for hurting me for this and that. My apologies fell into a third deaf. And over the years, I've just learned to give people time. The more you insist, the more the other will want to run away. You will become annoying to him with your calls, requests. He may start insulting you, just to make you stop bothering him. The opposite effect is obtained, she will say to herself whether she is still looking for me to explain and beg. The best thing you can do is give both of you time. Time for reflection, for healing the wounds. Yes, you can raise his ego to infinity with how much you want him again, how much you feel sorry for him and pray to him. He will feel flattered and great. But if he doesn't move his finger, or says he's sorry, all your regret is in the wind. You will be like an overly desperate woman clinging to him like a straw drowning man. He may even regret praying so much. You don't want him to think you're too desperate, and that you're going to be humiliated indefinitely, just to come back? The process is two-way, he has lost confidence in you, but you have lost confidence in him. He will have to struggle, not only you to run after him, forever redeeming your guilt. People love to fight for them, but not desperately. You fight for him and he fights for you? how sorry you are and pray to him. He will feel flattered and great. But if he doesn't move his finger, or says he's sorry, all your regret is in the wind. You will be like an overly desperate woman clinging to him like a straw drowning man. He may even regret praying so much. You don't want him to think you're too desperate, and that you're going to be humiliated indefinitely, just to come back? The process is two-way, he has lost confidence in you, but you have lost confidence in him. He will also have to struggle, not only to run after him, forever redeeming his guilt. People love to fight for them, but not desperately. You fight for him and he fights for you? how sorry you are and pray to him. He will feel flattered and great. But if he doesn't move his finger, or says he's sorry, all your regret is in the wind. You will be like an overly desperate woman clinging to him like a straw drowning man. He may even regret praying so much. You don't want him to think you're too desperate, and that you're going to be humiliated indefinitely, just to come back? The process is two-way, he has lost confidence in you, but you have lost confidence in him. He will have to struggle, not only you to run after him, forever redeeming your guilt. People love to fight for them, but not desperately. You fight for him and he fights for you? He may even regret praying so much. You don't want him to think you're too desperate, and that you're going to be humiliated indefinitely, just to come back? The process is two-way, he has lost confidence in you, but you have lost confidence in him. He will also have to struggle, not only to run after him, forever redeeming his guilt. People love to fight for them, but not desperately. You fight for him and he fights for you? He may even regret praying so much. You don't want him to think you're too desperate, and that you're going to be humiliated indefinitely, just to come back? The process is two-way, he has lost confidence in you, but you have lost confidence in him. He will have to struggle, not only you to run after him, forever redeeming your guilt. People love to fight for them, but not desperately. You fight for him and he fights for you?

   the boy has left, now he is free to chat with his exes, there is no one to hide from

   To number 1, 12 from number 7. You're right, I didn't think about it. The opposite effect can occur. It depends on the person opposite and whether he really loved her. If he is aware, he should understand her. One must be able to forgive, and writing with one's ex is not a pain to die. They must give themselves some time to lick their wounds, for her to stick to him, and to approach slowly, very slowly, and not to leave things to the whims of fate. He must eventually take them into his own hands, but if there is no positive answer he must stop after two or three attempts and wait, resume slowly and wait again without haste. I hope the person opposite is worth the effort. How much time and effort just because of a small stupid mistake. If approached carefully it will succeed.

   Not

   number 1 such advice does not pass in front of real men no real man goes back to where he lost confidence, for sex someone may be looking for you, but for a relationship, I personally doubt

   Haha number 1, it can work for a boy, never for a man. Out of curiosity ...: D. Look for it, men finally marry those ready to show that you care. If in case he is "angry", if you are offended and the man loves you, he will look for you. Don't listen to number one, once she's analyzed how to make someone come back and give so many examples from her life, imagine how much she's lost. I know one .... "proud", it's a pity, you don't be a pity.

   To 16 of 1 To renew the connection they were looking for me, or just to see how I am. Yes, there have been cases of sex, but I have not covered them. Doubt, but it is so. They were looking for me to reunite, because with someone else it wasn't what he expected, or it wasn't better. It has even happened to me for sex, but you can imagine that if a man stops looking for sex from his ex, he just has to be unable to take off another, whether because of feelings or not. With so many women all over town leaning on your ex, you just either love her or you don't become a stripper. My advice under numbers 1 and 12 was based on the fact that not only he lost confidence, but she too. They must have said terrible things to each other, he hit her, and only she knows what else. I don't know if there are real men, but there are many who will not admit their mistakes, or take a step towards reconciliation. It's like it's so complicated to say sorry, I shouldn't have done and said this and that. It is very easy for the other to take all the blame, but the relationship is two. The girl was wrong about one thing, he was wrong. Many people underestimate time and that someone misses you. If the girl is constantly boiling in the field of view, the effect may be the opposite, that is, a species presses him, pursues and imposes its will on him. Many men have a panicky fear of serious conversations in general. And if he just pulls away, disappears from the face of the earth, he will have a lack. I will remember her, he said. Even if he spits it out in front of others, the strong negative reaction is still a sign that this person is in your thoughts. He will wonder what he is doing. He knows, for example, the schedule and when he rests, where he lives. If he sees a place where the two were, will remember her. He will even think about having sex with her. She will feel even the slightest fear that she will be forgotten and that she will be with someone else at the moment, and that the other person will make her happier. People do not like to forget them, and after a while the guarantee will receive signs of life from him-her call, her some order, her emoticon. Pure psychology and even affecting the ego.

   First, personal correspondence is personal. That is, your friend has no business digging into it. Your first mistake is that you let him watch it. Do not rummage in the partner's chats, do not read his SMS or mail. This is rude and dishonest. Second, you made the mistake of promising not to talk to your ex again. There is no such film. You will talk to whomever you want. You're not fucking, are you? Your friend must stop treating you as property and exerting pressure with such ultimate methods. You are an adult, not a pet, who fulfills the whims of his master. If you let them treat you like that now, in five years they'll forbid you from going out for coffee with friends. Paranoid ... Grandpa Torbalan

   Go to number 17 of 1 Acts for men over 20 and over 30. I'm 27 as much as the girl's friend. Everyone has lost, hardly anyone has ever been abandoned. It's good to show that she cares, as long as it's not one-way, and not to make her feel sorry for her efforts or make fun of her. Many may refute me, but hardly anyone will want to be desperately wanted, be it a man or a woman. If the girl is just doing something and he is standing, it is not right. Everyone has dignity and a limit, and sometimes it is good to withdraw so that the other can struggle. I am against only one to seek and apologize, and the other not to care. Everyone has dignity, and you can't trample and humiliate him for a long time so that someone will accept you again. It is a pity for some men who will not move a finger to keep a woman, and quickly give her up. They are also pathetic, where they encroach, they insult. It is a pity that in time they will plow everything because they loved someone, but when they had to, they did nothing to bring her back. Author, things should be two-way. If you see that he has no desire, or is cold, furious, back off. Let him breathe, let him get away. Let yourself think about whether you want this person and why. But I would not advise you only to fight in vain, because it also crushes. It's like a re-separation. A lot can be written, but in the end it all depends on you two. You take a step, and so does he. Compromises and compromises again. Success! Let him breathe, let him get away. Let yourself think about whether you want this person and why. But I would not advise you only to fight in vain, because it also crushes. It's like a re-separation. A lot can be written, but in the end it all depends on you two. You take a step, and so does he. Compromises and compromises again. Success! Let him breathe, let him get away. Let yourself think about whether you want this person and why. But I would not advise you only to fight in vain, because it also crushes. It's like a re-separation. A lot can be written, but in the end it all depends on you two. You take a step, and so does he. Compromises and compromises again. Success!

   First finish kindergarten and grow up a little, and only then think about serious relationships ...

   I am a man of principles and I will explain to those who think why it will not work if the boy is like me. Everyone has a past, but the past is therefore past, and if it enters my present, the girl I am with becomes a past. Here Grandpa Torbalan may pretend to be a philosopher that I am jealous and limiting, but he will be disappointed. I have been with my partner for almost 20 years and she has complete freedom to do whatever she wants to go where and when she wants, but when we went seriously I said the following words: keep the honor of the other, you have full and unlimited freedom to do whatever you want, but if something reaches me that my principles do not accept, then I also have complete freedom to decide whether to stay in this relationship. Clear, concise and precise.

   Stop looking for it and actively avoid it. The man is insecure, unstable and irrational with tendencies towards violence. What you see now is 100 times worse in the long run. To summarize: - you go crazy writing to a man. What if you talk to a man? What if you kiss a man? He wants to isolate you - the first sign of a domestic abuser. - he touched you. It is clear where this will escalate - the second sign. - tries to manipulate you emotionally "I love you, but I don't trust you, you are to blame for everything". You are considered to have done something wrong and nothing has happened. The third sign for a domestic abuser. Tenk yu, next!

   From the author: Thank you all for the advice and comments. Yes, I made a mistake, I apologized, I talked, I tried to fix things, but the opposite is true. And he keeps in touch with his ex, but I've never had a problem with that. Is this chat such a big deal? !! Anyway, for the second week without any reaction from him. The only thing that happened was that when I stopped calling him, he called me the next day to ask for his presents, otherwise he would sue me, followed by a huge scandal and a series of calls from him in a very rude tone. . Especially when he found out I was in a nightclub, he just freaked out. And since then there has been a grave silence on his part, I called him 2 days after the incident to hear him, and he told me to keep his gifts, that he doesn't want anything from me, he doesn't want to see me, hear me, etc.

   To the author of 1, 12, 18, 20 She has quite immature behavior. And I've heard many times how he doesn't want to see me anymore, he hears and it's all over. And not from one, and repeated many times. And guess what, after a while, those same people who swear it's the end and can't see you are surprisingly looking for you. This is the typical behavior of an injured and angry man. A colleague who is the same size as my mother told me the following when she saw me upset at work on one that she was doing like yours at the moment, that is, she avoided contact with me at all. I was smaller and more sensitive then. So she told me - Let him try to bring you back, to realize that he wants you in his life, that your love can handle it. He is not offered to crawl at his feet. Have the strength and dignity to step back and let him do something. Sometimes the lack of action is very indicative. And if he comes back, always keep one thing in mind. Once he has left and given up on you, he can do it again. This was more or less paraphrased, but it helped me a lot then. As he stands alone, he will pass by and look for you. He may try another, but she will not tolerate his nonsense as you do. This, in my opinion, is another reason why they come back, because another does not tolerate his behavior and whims, and does not tolerate like you. The question is not whether he will return, but why he is like that again. as you do. This, in my opinion, is another reason why they come back, because another does not tolerate his behavior and whims, and does not tolerate like you. The question is not whether he will return, but why he is like that again. as you do. This, in my opinion, is another reason why they come back, because another does not tolerate his behavior and whims, and does not tolerate like you. The question is not whether he will return, but why he is like that again.

   Interesting story and even more interesting comments. Admiration for the commenter under number 7, I had not seen such a valuable comment for a long time, but the advice somehow became meaningless after the second inclusion of the author. So he can chat with his ex, and you can't - there's something wrong with this guy's head. I was also shattered by his desire to take back his gifts - it sounds crazy to me, these are not gifts, but bribes, he bought your attention with various trinkets. I was inclined to justify the slap you asked for yourself, but in the above circumstances I take my excuses back, it is not worth fighting for such a person, on the contrary, you must do everything possible not to see and hear more, ie. the writer's advice under number 1 falls into the channel. After your second post as an author, it became clear that "guzen - negonen runs away", the man is worried about your chats because he knows what he is chatting with his ex, he is afraid that you may share the same things he shares, he is afraid that the same thoughts may be spinning in your head as they are spinning in his . The only positive thing in your history is to conclude that the exes are therefore exes, their place is in the past - you have or do not have the present, the exes must know their place.