Hello, I want to tell you my story. I am a 23 year old boy and I have a girlfriend of 4 and a half years who is 20 years old. We have been living together for about 3 years and we were very well. We love each other a lot, we are together everywhere, we lived great (in my opinion). In general, we are both very jealous, but she is more jealous than me. Although I'm jealous now and I had a lot of faith and I didn't think she could do anything. That's how it came this summer, when she first created an account on a dating site. She wrote all summer with guys from the site and even gave her phone and talked to them (she didn't meet anyone). Then she deletes her profile and realizes that this is wrong and stops, but after 1 month she started writing to an acquaintance of mine to whom she writes works like "I only want you", "give me a kiss" and things like that until the moment I see this chat. So, her explanation is that, first of all, she loves me very much and she didn't want to cheat on me. Her self-esteem had dropped a lot (she was over the last 2 years) and she wanted to raise it like the boys and they wrote how beautiful she was and how beautiful her body was (she had uploaded fake photos of her body on the dating site). Then she realized it was wrong and stopped him. But after a while, her self-esteem dropped again, and this time she decided to be with someone who had seen her so she could ask for a compliment or something. She knew about the mild behavior of this acquaintance of mine and decided to start writing to him, but in her attempt to ask for a compliment, she wrote such things that she went out as a light woman. My problem is that she lied to me for so long and did these things behind my back. It was a shock to me to see what she wrote and I don't know. I can no longer have faith in anything. I do not know what to do. Give some advice.
Answers 19
By the way, it is very likely that she was telling the truth and that she did it because of her low self-esteem. We women are coquettish and there is nothing to lie about - we enjoy compliments. BUT the question remains why she didn't ask you for this first, but flew to make registrations. The question of lying to the other also remains. "Give a kiss" - let's say it's a joke, BUT this "I want only with you" ???? Enough! She went too far, even if she was innocent and had no intention of cheating on you. Because now your acquaintance will think that she makes you a monkey. She has not preserved your masculine honor, and I think that is unforgivable. You know best, but that's what things look like at first reading
From the Author to comment 1: I completely agree with your opinion, because mine is the same. She says that these writings "I only want you" and "give me a kiss" she did not want them but wrote them so that she could receive the same from him. I talked to this man after I found out and he explained to me that he took everything as a joke. It is clear that it is not known whether it is true or tells me what I want to hear, but I do not know I think there is no reason for him to lie to me.
I don't think you have anything to worry about. We women are like that, we love compliments, we like to arouse admiration. I don't think she has serious feelings for this boy, rather for her it's an innocent flirtation and a way to boost her self-esteem. You yourself say that she is overweight, for us women to look in the mirror in the morning and not like what we see is a very unpleasant experience and can ruin our self-esteem, so she was obviously looking for an artificial way to convince herself that it's still cool. Nothing scary! So instead of getting angry with her, try to show her that she is still the most beautiful, that she is your princess, etc. and you will see how she herself will stop with the stupid flirtations on the net. I'm a woman and I can tell you that I do it when I don't feel feminine and I feel underestimated by my boyfriend, but that doesn't mean
You brought water from nine bucks, just to get the boy to blame for not appreciating it and so on. This is her immature behavior for me of a light woman who is looking for someone to curse her plum, she has put your horn dude! I wouldn't forgive him for that, she lied to you then, doing all this behind your back, why do you think she's telling you the truth now? !!
This is a bitch, get rid of her while it's time!
Sometimes we women need to be told that we are beautiful to be complimented. If she hasn't cheated on you, I don't think there's anything to worry about. If I'm in your place, I'll give it back to her and move on
Oh, not what do you do with her at all? She seems to have enough self-confidence, don't tie her up! Get rid of her, you don't need a girl like that. How is it going to be a boyfriend with you and get hooked with other boys. It's really light. My advice is to dump her! Come on success!
Question to number 6 from a misunderstanding of women's affairs. "Sometimes we women need to be told that we are beautiful to be complimented." and do you do the same job? Thanks in advance for the reply.
yes, women love compliments, they like to be courted ... and at one point they give in, and because they still lack something, they go to bed with this or that, then they misunderstand, roar, unhappy ... who knows what he wants doesn't do nonsense. .. It is...
Boy, how do you trust your girlfriend now? !? Not to mention that you caught her, that is, if he hadn't cut them, there would have been more hahahahaha. These things she did are idiotic. Find someone else with more intelligence so you don't have a headache later!
I think give it a chance. Learn that you should not trust anyone unreservedly, as well as rely too much… otherwise you will always be hurt and disappointed. But this is a separate topic. I will direct you to another direction for reflection - why did she ask for someone else's attention, did she miss yours ?? You can be with a woman for 2, 3 or 10 years, but she always needs to feel beautiful and wanted by her partner, to know that he likes and notices her.
Off you very easily give the definition of "easy woman". I am 20 years old and my shortest relationship was 6 months. And not to mention the longest ... There was attention, attitude, approach and everything else that keeps love alive. However, there comes a moment (after the first year together) in which you want to experience the first emotions, compliments and courtship from a new acquaintance. It's a thrill. It's important to keep a borderline distance and know when to stop, everything else is harmless. I have been with my current boyfriend for 1 year and we live together. There is a lack of intimacy, which of course does not mean that he does not love me. Maybe I want more than he can give me. We see each other every day, go to bed next to each other, share everything in everyday life. I guess that makes him move away and not pay so much attention to me. At such a moment I sit in front of the laptop and find someone who feels like me ... what's so weird about sending him a little attention ... attention, in which there are also words "there is something unique in you" or "overturned my idea of today's girls "or" I want a man like you, next to me ".. these words raise your broken eyes, constantly looking for tenderness. Does that make me easy? I have never reached the outside world and cheated in the worst way ... the boundaries within me were only virtual and momentary. So you have nothing to forgive her for, the sure guarantee is that despite her current weaknesses ... she is still with you. Show concern .. even one "how are you" changes the whole situation, compliments her, which will make her feel proud of herself .. and I'm convinced that dumps and low self-esteem will soon fade away! Success! :)
Excuse me? what she just wrote to other boys. Let's trust her now, we will lose. I recommend that you keep your trust in her - when you catch her in a mold with a boy - I just hope I'm not that boy. And if you agree to a threesome - will you be able to? you raise your self-esteem. Go back to finish the topic - when you realize that you are redundant. There was a topic here recently - in which the boy wonders if he is dumb - or blind?
Dude, your girlfriend has muffin behavior, those excuses are ridiculous. Can you imagine in 5-10 years how much her self-confidence will drop? Then he must go through the whole neighborhood. Most women are like that, looking for someone who is sure to accept them, no matter what happens. After that, they start waving left and right as they please.
In my opinion, if you love her and if you think she loves you too, you should forgive her. Mine had also made a mistake but I forgave and now we are still together. We live a life, if you love her, live it with her, if you don't love her, then it's better to dump her now than later. Good luck
This with dating sites is a disease in many people. Forgive her, it's human to say goodbye, BUT - if you find her on the site again after a while, run away from her and never look back. I tell you from experience with such a woman. M 31
dating site? fidelity? women go tell them to those with whom you write!
Number 12 what long and short relationships you are talking about, so you are only 20, you hardly know what a relationship is, you probably think that a relationship ends with having sex with someone, and now you give advice from personal experience. To the author - regardless of your girlfriend's motives, she has cheated on you in her thoughts and most likely will not stop doing it, and from thoughts to actions is one step. They have already written to you above, think about your own dignity and honor - obviously the person does not respect you! I personally would part with such a woman while it is time, you are young, use your strength and energy to make a happy man who deserves it and will reciprocate! Success!
Trust and respect are the basis of every friendship and every serious relationship ... for me at least it is so ... And especially for the women who commented on the topic - look - we are also itchy Ego and other things along it ... and we we wonder "what will happen if I crush the tits of the new saleswoman in the non-stop opposite" ... and we are strong enough for someone to laugh at our stupid jokes and we are people and we need attention as much as you ... We are not only interested in having it somewhere and then falling asleep ...., although there are such situations;) ... And finally something that annoyed me a lot: but let's think about this acquaintance, who in this case he doesn't care about happiness ... what if he cared, if he had already swallowed the float ... how does he play with people and their emotions so lightly ?? !! This is a demonstration of selfishness ... I would give her a chance if she could make me believe her again,